Yep- that’s right! I found my first TWO grey hairs today. Not just one, two! As I sat in the usual Friday Boulder traffic I couldn’t stop staring at them. They were just sitting there glowing, shining, and perhaps mocking me. So what did I do? Pulled them out. Two swift moves and they were gone. Yes, I know rumor has it that 4 will now grow back in their places, but I needed them gone at that instance.
It was a weird feeling, or should I say feelings. At first glance I was completely horrified. How can I possibly be getting grey hairs? I know I’m staring 25 in the face right now, but isn’t that too young to be looking at grey hairs? Then, I began think of how I feel when I look at someone with a head full of grey hairs. I feel admiration. I look up to these people, as they are full of wisdom and knowledge. They have seen more than I and have stories to tell. I respect those of this wisdom. I felt a little honored that these grey hairs decided to pop up.
I’ve oddly never been afraid of growing older. I’ve actually looked forward to it. When I was in school I looked forward to the day I could work an 8-hour shift and not have to worry about homework at the end of the day. I liked the idea of making my own money and supporting myself-becoming more independent. Now, work is great, but it bogs me down! I want to be out hiking, training, doing the things I enjoy with my dogs and friends. Real world responsibilities are not as great as I thought, but then they are. I love having my own house and my own car. Now only if I could pay the bills and play all the time-that’s why I now look forward to retirement. Or winning the lottery, but I have to play the lottery to win…details.
I guess working, prioritizing, and sacrificing make life worth living. Having ups and downs just so you know how to truly appreciate those good days. I’ve grown to love the bad days. They can be emotionally tolling and make me feel like I’ll never get the chance to come up for air, but then when a good day follows, what a feeling! Warmth, satisfaction and jubilance. Whether these bad days are brought about by stress, some negative words, things not going as planned, or merely waking up on the wrong side of the bed, I’m forcing myself to take breaths. To write and reflect on these feelings and find that deeper meaning, find a solution and change my outlook.
I seem to find a common theme through my reflections: patience. I lack it, but I sure can preach it. When I decide on doing something I want it to happen immediately. If it takes a long period of time to accomplish I lose interest and then I get disappointed in myself for not following through.
I’ve been blessed with a new addition to my life that beholds patience. An observer. An innocent. An incredible giver of human hugs. A brilliant. One with big round eyes that look at me eagerly as if to say, “What’s next? Gosh I hope toys are involved!” He’s up for anything, so long as it is with me. He’s full of joy and wants to please. This is where I find myself struggling with patience. It’s so easy to keep asking for more and skipping over the boring small stuff, but I refuse to be a trainer constantly working with “Band-Aids” never getting a complete picture. There’s no use in moving forward until all those holes are filled in. Epic’s got lots of fun foundation work games and I’ve got a lot of GRE review ahead of me the few months, but keeping the end goal (a long term goal) in mind, success is in the future with a little bit of diligence and patience.
Lookout Agility 